Veins of Glass Entry – 10/15/08

“Jesus, Lord of Heaven, I do not deserve the grace that you have given.”


Wednesday, 15 October 2008
.:I’m So Afraid of Waking; Please Don’t Shake Me:.
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: From The Inside Out by Hillsong United
Topic: Random

On life changes…
(nothing drastic, I assure you)

As I normally do, I have been thinking about life and my future, and how much I want web design to be a part of it.  How badly do I want it?  Well, I’m not in doubt as I once was. I do want it.  While martial arts is my first love, web design is something I can see myself making a living from… happily.  I already wake up, roll out of bed, and think “I don’t want to go to work today” every morning.  I don’t want that for my life and I know it won’t be a problem when I’m a web designer. 
The question now continues to be “do I have what it takes?”  Well sure. If I set my mind to it and try hard enough, I can acheive this goal.  I think I can do well.  But the more I think about it, the more I remember that I don’t actually have a back up plan.  Things don’t always go the way you want them to, as I know very well. 
So it raises more and more questions.  What else can I do well?  What else am I interested in?  What else can I see myself doing for the rest of my life?   I’ve thought of something else that might suit me.  So I’ve considered a minor in Graphic Design.  I’ve decided to look into the program offered at Moraine Valley.  When/if I can afford to, I might look into a four year college.  Maybe not. I enjoy having money as opposed to spending it.  But it’s a thought.  We’ll see. 

On Dreaming…
(The song has changed to Always Forever by Phil Wickham)

I wish I was the type of person who could easily remember dreams after waking.  I rarely remember them.  Unless they stand out in a significant way, scare the crap out of me, or make me feel particularly happy, my subconcious clearly doesn’t care enough to keep track of them.  Most of time, especially recently, I don’t care.  I kind of wish I remembered the one I had last night.  It was odd.  I must say though, if it happened in real life… that’d be a strange twist of events.  Anyway. 

On Excitement…
(The song has changed to Open the Eyes of My Heart by Paul Baloche)

Oh my gosh!  The Twilight movie comes out next month! 
(Forgive me.  I needed an excited girlie moment)

On Prose…

I’ve had ideas for a story recently.  I’m not even sure if I’ve mentioned it or not.  I decided to add a new blog to my website for my writing.  Doesn’t matter what.  I’m not posting the link here, nor is it going to be obviously posted on my website.  It is going to be hidden somewhere for the time being. The reason being that it is a lot more personal than this one is.  I’ll probably be typing a lot of spoilers to my story, a lot of quotes that inspire me, along with possible real life events.  Maybe I’ll post a chapter one day, then incoherant scribblings the next.  So like I said, it will be hidden somewhere on my website.  And if you’re smart, you’ll know where to look.  I just really want to get back into writing. I’ve been stumped for awhile. 

Obligatory Random Song lyrics.

Mighty to Save by Hillsong United
(now playing on my Zune)

Everyone needs compassion  
A love thats neverending
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a savior The hope of nations
*chorus* 
Saviour he can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save

Forever author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again I
give my life to follow
Everything i believe in
Now i surrender
 *chorus* x2  
Shine your light and let the whole world see
Were singing for the glory of the risen king JESUS x2
*chorus* x2  
Shine you light and let the whole world see
Were singing for the glory of the risen king
JESUS x6
 
โ™ฅJessi

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